Emergence

Written by: Emily Decloux

His eyes were like black glass when I met him. But I don’t know what else I was expecting. After so many sleepless nights wondering if it was true, my suspicions were finally confirmed. It doesn’t make a difference anyway, no one would ever believe me.

I’m laid back, legs up, spread-eagle. My eyes reflexively snap shut when the bright lights power on. And I feel every single stab. Every single prick. Every single jab, even though they told me I wouldn’t. I stop begging them to tell me what’s happening, and instead just give into it, I’m frozen anyway, immobile. Before I got to this point, they gave me something. I’d heard about it in stories, but never really understood it until now, that you really are truly at the mercy of their whims.

There’s a gallery watching me, observing me. Do they know where he is? The one that started all of this, who left me here, ripped open, bleeding, pieces of me cast aside on a table just out of sight. I can’t see their faces, all I can see are grey shapes moving around me as I dip in and out of consciousness. One comes in and just stares. Motionless. My eyes meet theirs and there’s no empathy, only a sick medical fascination with what’s being done to me.

How many others have they taken here before?

When I was little I always wondered what it would be like to travel to the stars. I would gaze up at the night sky thinking, one day, I’ll go home. I remember the instant I realized that thought was strange. So I stopped looking at the stars.

My mind wanders to him now. Does he know I’m lying here, that I can’t get to where he is? Or has he already forgotten my existence, immediately disposing of me once I’ve served my purpose. I am emptied.

They keep working.

The machines make rhythmic, pulsing noises I’ve never heard before - or maybe I have, in dreams. Why do they sound so familiar? Sometimes it speeds up, sometimes it slows down. I want to know what it means. I want to know what all of this means. I want someone to tell me it’s going to be okay, that I didn’t fuck everything up by wanting too much.

I want my mom.

Before, I was the picture of perfection. I did what every good girl is supposed to do. Find a nice man. Get married. The obvious next steps. But the next step wasn’t happening for us, so we let our dream go. One night I found myself looking at the stars again. Begging. This is all my fault.

They’re moving me now. It’s so dark. I can hear another woman’s raspy breath, exhausted from screaming, passing me by. They make me stand and I feel blood rush between my legs onto the floor. I don’t think I have much left, he took so much from me when it happened. I don’t blame him though. I asked for this. I asked for all of it.

As I’m laid down again, I hear myself screaming for him, I feel the tears rushing down my face, but the grey shapes silently move around me, doing their work. I feel a rush, and I go quiet. What remained of the light in this place is snuffed out, and I disappear into the darkness.

When I finally wake up I don’t recognize where I am, it’s like I’ve lost hours, maybe even days of time. Isn’t this one of the things they said could happen? Losing time. Losing myself.

This place is different, it’s bright and warm. I feel a hand on mine, I look over and see my husband asleep in the chair next to me. I’m in a hospital room. How did he know I was here? I don’t understand how I got here.

I see the tubes and needles stuck in my veins and I start to pull at them. My husband wakes up. A nurse comes in and tells me I need my rest. I tell her that I need to see him, and I start to get out of the bed, but I’m still weak from everything they did to me and I collapse. My husband helps me up as the nurse calls for help. They say I’ve been dipping in and out of consciousness, they’re telling me things that I’ve said, but I have no memory of saying them.

My husband disappears.

I hear the other woman’s raspy voice call out in an agonized sob. The nurse is in and out so quickly there’s no time for me to ask her where they all went.

Hours pass.

And then… all at once he’s here. With me again. I stare, wordless. I’m not used to seeing him like this. Does he remember me?

The nurse places him on my chest, he’s breathing, he’s so warm. His eyes open and look right into mine, clear and beautiful. So beautiful. The nurse asks me if we’ve chosen a name. The world melts away, as if the last 24 hours never happened.

Emily Decloux is a mom, comedy artist, director, producer, actor and writer from Toronto. She is 1/5th of Big Chick Energy, an award winning sketch comedy troupe, and a graduate of the Second City sketch, improv and conservatory programs. She spent 2024 mostly pregnant, and gave birth on HALLOWEEN OMG, but in 2023 she got married and debuted her short film WORM at the Hamilton Film Festival, the same year that Big Chick Energy won the Producers' Pick award at TOSketchfest. In 2022 she released “Take Your Life More Seriously” a comedy music album to rave reviews from her mom, and in 2019 she produced and directed two web series, Venture Shark and Date Kate. In 2018 Emily debuted her feature film Impossible Horror which she co-produced with her husband Justin Decloux, and composed the score for, at the Toronto After Dark film festival to a sold out theatre. In 2016 she co-produced a live radio-play podcast called VRMP Radio: The Five People You Meet In Hell. When she was unemployed for far too long in 2014 she released a kid’s album of music called Gross Kid Songs. That same year she joined forces with Justin Decloux to finish his first feature film Teddy Bomb, even dubbing the voice of his ex-girlfriend's character. Emily is also ½ of the YouTube channel PineappleSkeleton where she produces short sketches with Justin Decloux. When Emily is not creating comedy or writing creepy stories, you can find her taking on unreasonably difficult sewing projects or baking far too much cake for her friends.

Follow Emily:

EmilyDecloux.com | BigChickEnergy.com | ImpossibleHorror.com | TeddyBomb.com